A new quick mock-up. Two of the toughest side characters on 'Seinfeld' finally clash in a confrontation that could lead to blows. It's Bob v the Busboy!
by E.J. Tangonan
I’m not supposed to hate you but I do/
maybe it’s the way you treat me/ maybe it’s your fuckin’ crew/
you got em eating out your hand/ and you got me eating it too/
but when I eat, I’m overzealous/ and I bite more than I can chew/
maybe it’s cause you know too much/ and I ain’t got no fuckin clue/
you like to make things fall apart/ and then take my fuckin glue/
it’s a slew of these things you knew/ that would grow and it grew/
and it’s true/ all of these opportunities, I blew/
so now my fists at the sky and I’m calling you out/
I know it’s my fault/ that I ever gave you benefit of doubt/
Boom, pow/ smashing my face in front of the crowd/
They all laugh at me/ cause my roar could never match your sound/
so it’s blasphemy/ how long could this last for me?/
and this shadow cast on me/ has enough power for catastrophe/
bloodied and flesh-wound/ and now hot wax on me/
so I can be a figure/ for an exhibit showing mass dummies
Then I get up one last time/ for good measure
and you deliver the knockout blow/ for forever
I should’ve known better/ than to be messin with you
I don’t have to commit, but I can be fit/ to mingling with your crew
you got em eating out your hand/ and you got me eating it too
but when I eat, I’m overzealous/ and I bite more than I can chew
This week, two of my entries have been included in the Cracked article, "20 Movie Posters Too Breathtaking For Hollywood." The prompt for the contest, which the title of the article doesn't necessarily reflect, is to take modern movies and to give them a classic, Saul Bass-esque makeover. Not necessarily minimalist, but more than floating actor heads on a poster and more of the works of art classic Hollywood is used to. One of my entries, which placed 17th, is SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING. I'm not incredibly pleased with how it turned out, so I was surprised it placed higher than the other one I am featuring here. Everyone seems to be responding more to my JOHN WICK entry, which I am more proud of. I have even seen a couple of comments where people weren't interested in seeing the movie until they saw my poster! So...marketing commission! Just kidding. But it's pretty cool I was able to reach them when the actual marketing campaign didn't.
This year, the fantasy football consolation prize movie poster goes to Sam Robinson's friend Jason Peterson. I've done a Star Wars-type design. I've done a wacky comedy. Last year, I did a big sci-fi action poster (that was not Star Wars inspired). This year, I went with a heart-wrenching character drama. The movie is pretentiously titled "The Caravan Melodies" and it's on everybody's Top 10 list of the year. I have also included a "critics praise" For Your Consideration Edition of the poster with quotes written by Sam Robinson.
Taika Waititi is quickly becoming one of my favorite filmmakers. He's such an unorthodox choice to helm a big budget movie, but after hearing he's going to make "Thor: Ragnarok" a buddy comedy with Hulk and seeing the retro logo, I decided to make a throwback-style poster for this movie. Plus, an aged one for good measure.
This week, I am showcasing fan posters I've done for "The Fifth Element" and a Christmas time favorite, "Gremlins."
For "Fifth Element," I tried to make an anime/live action fusion poster and filtered the hell out of it. Didn't quite come out as I hoped, but I still liked the look of it, so I kept the look and lost the anime theme.
It's Christmas time and as a tribute to one of my favorite and underrated Christmas time movies, I created a modern take on a 'Gremlins' poster. I decided to go for a vague sign/card featuring the town of Kingston Falls being ruined by our favorite little mischievous creatures.
For the alternate one, I decided to do a minimalist approach, very much in the vain of the dvd/bluray covers. I have taken out the Kingston Falls reference and now the creatures are ripping through just the poster.
Submitted these for a Cracked contest entitled "Minor aspects of STAR WARS that should get their own movie" which was a play off of Rogue One getting their own movie.
"Dex's Diner" is a riff on the fact that there's a '50s diner that exists in the Star Wars universe from Episode II.
"The Straight Star Wars Story" is a riff on the Disney movie "The Straight Story" set to the aftermath of the Death Star blowing up when Vader was chased off by Han Solo and seemed to fly off into deep space with no indication of nearby help. (although it's entirely possible he could've hid on Yavin) The version which placed has no sun to make space look more lonely.
"Forced" is a riff on the virgin birth of Anakin and how only Qui-Gon could really deduce why it happened. The conflict is Watto suspects she's lying. Done in a '80s comedy style.
"Army of Two" and "Rivals" Posters
Last week, Cracked.com ran their weekly Photoplasty (photoshop) contest. One of the week's themes was titled "Your Movie Cast/Actor/Director Dream Team" which was then retitled "21 Movies We Can't Believe Nobody Has Made" for the front page.
My two submissions are below. One of them placed while the other didn't. The first, Army of Two poster, is a video game adaptation involving two muscular, charismatic soldiers. The second, which did not place puts together two of my current favorite stand-up comedians, Louis C.K. and Bill Burr as rival sports fans. Both can also be viewed in the Graphic Design page in my portfolio.
Note: As the Army of Two placed, Cracked now owns the image, however I have gone and retweaked my submission for display here.
What if Batman cured the Joker? It may be sacrilege, but I decided to explore an idea of Batman actually succeeding to do the impossible and rehabilitate the Joker with his extreme ailments. It feels very out of character of the dark relationship to actually have a happy ending, but I wanted to think outside of the box even if it feels like sugary/bubbly happy ending that would make little sense.
E.J. is just a simple man who loves movies. Don't judge.